What I’ve been learning about spirituality.

How to Have More Mental Wellbeing in Your Life

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 15-06-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
How to Have More Mental Wellbeing

I was recently at a seminar about mental wellbeing facilitated by Dr. Bill Pettit and his wife, Dr. Linda Pettit. They are a psychiatrist and psychologist with many decades of clinical experience. What makes them and this seminar interesting, however, was rather than focusing on the mental illnesses and diagnoses of what’s wrong, they are more interested in the opposite. That is, the innate wellbeing inside each of their patients. From the schizophrenic to the bipolar, to the average couple having marital problems, this pair of Docs (paradox!) are able to see right past all of that. They zero in on the natural mental health that resides deep within their patients (and all of us). Read the rest of this entry »

Being Authentic: Why You Should Never Hide Behind a Fake You

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Thought | Posted on 01-06-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Are You Hiding Your True SelfWhy is it so hard for us to be our true authentic self?

My guess is fear.

It seems that our authenticity gets “beaten” out of us when we’re little. Between getting teased as kids for being our wacky selves and our parents berating us to “act like everyone else,” slowly but surely we start to create a public persona that’s considered socially acceptable. We believe if the rest of the world knew how crazy, weird, dumb, silly or whatever we are deep inside, that there’s no way in hell they could like us–let alone love us. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Transform Any Bad Situation

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 16-05-2016

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Warning…this post contains bad language!

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Will You Choose Fear or Love?Which would you prefer: feeling good or feeling bad?

I’m guessing most of you would say feeling good. And yet…

…so often when confronted with “negative” situations, we hold onto bad feelings a whole lot longer than necessary.

While we go through many emotions throughout our day, the negative ones can seem so “normal” that we don’t even notice them. However, I’ve found the more I make a point to observe my thoughts, the more aware I am of when they are in turmoil. Read the rest of this entry »

My 3 Year Anniversary of Taking Back My Life

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Healthy Activities, Healthy Eating, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 04-05-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Yay Me!This past Sunday (May 1, 2016) marked 3 years since I began my transformational journey. What started as a simple decision to lose weight, has culminated in a whole new me–both physically and mentally.

Here’s a recap: Read the rest of this entry »

How to Break the Cycle of ‘Bad’ Relationships

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Thought | Posted on 21-04-2016

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Break The Bad Relationship Cycle!Unless we live alone in a cave with no access to the outside world, we’re always having some sort of relationship with others. These range from casual “smile at you in the street” relationships, to those we have with co-workers, close friends, family, partners, etc.  As adults, we develop a particular way of dealing with each of these types of relationships based on who we believe we are, as well who we perceive others to be. In other words, we deal with people based on beliefs and perceptions that we make up in our heads. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Live in Peace Regardless of Your Circumstances

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Meditation, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 06-04-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

PeaceHow’s life treating you these days?

Is it fun? Is it peaceful?

Or is it tedious and hard?

If you answered the latter, what’s making life such a struggle for you? Read the rest of this entry »

An Unconditional Love Letter From My True Self to Yours

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 23-03-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Unconditional LoveLast summer someone close to me acted in a manner that based on my values and belief system, I deemed as wrong and unnecessary. For an entire evening as well as throughout the night, my thoughts about the situation were out of control. I woke up the next day and my head felt like it was about to explode. My understanding of how life works had me telling myself “It’s just thought,” but it did nothing to ease the pain I was in. While unsuccessfully trying to distract myself via my iPad, I received an email that was a summary of a talk called “Trusting Others and A Course in Miracles” given by Marianne Williamson. The topic of trust didn’t seem related to my situation, but I clicked over to read it anyway. Read the rest of this entry »

Are You Keeping Score in Your Relationships?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 09-03-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Are You Keeping Score?For many, a natural consequence of life is to (unofficially) keep score in relationships. For instance, “I called him last time, so it’s his turn to call this time.” “He paid last time, so I’ll pay this time.” “I said “I love you, so now it’s her turn.” But when the score starts getting out of whack, people often freak out and may even start to think and feel like they’re being taken advantage of. Certainly if a relationship is sooooo one-sided in all respects it may be time to re-evaluate it. But in most relationships, this isn’t the case.

Much of the time the uneven score can be chalked up to a simple misunderstanding: Read the rest of this entry »

Should Others Have to Earn Our Trust?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 24-02-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

To Trust or Not to TrustWhen I hear of people who no longer trust others because they were “burned before,” it makes me sad.

As I see it, there are two ways of looking at trust:

The first is to see people as untrustworthy until proven otherwise, and the second is the opposite–to see people as trustworthy until proven otherwise.

Only a one-word difference, but with huge implications. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Stop Suffering and Feeling Like Crap

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spiritual Teachings, Thought | Posted on 05-02-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
Where We Control The World!
It’s becoming clearer to me that much of–if not all–our suffering is caused by our desire to control ourselves, our surroundings and others. Yet in reality, it’s impossible. Read the rest of this entry »

You Have No Competition Because They Are Not You

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Business, Spiritual Teachings | Posted on 01-02-2016

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If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.

[Jill’s Note: I wrote a version of this post in a Facebook Group for budding coaches last summer and was reminded of it yesterday as I was listening to the classic Og Mandino’s “The World’s Greatest Salesman – Scroll #4.” Apparently my last blog post on approaching people with love instead of judgment reminded my sister of Scroll #2 in that book which is why I was listening to it in the first place. Great minds think alike as I could relate to much of what Mandino says as it relates to business. He’s a little more “Go get ’em tiger” than I ever was, but his overall message was very similar to how I ran my business for over 18 years. Mandino’s Scroll #4 starts out:

“I am nature’s greatest miracle. Since the beginning of time, never has there been another with my mind, my heart, my eyes, my hands, my hair, my mouth. None that came before, none that live today, and none that come tomorrow can walk and talk and move and think exactly like me.”

To me, this notion has always been the key to business success as you’ll see from my post below written long before I ever heard of Og Mandino! – Jill ] Read the rest of this entry »

Labeling and Judging: Why Do We Label Others?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spirituality, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 26-01-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Being JudgedNow that I’m often observing my thoughts, I’ve noticed some that surprise me.  For instance, I never thought of myself as judgmental, yet some of my thoughts tell me otherwise. Read the rest of this entry »

My Mentors and What I’ve Been Reading and Watching

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Miscellaneous, Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality | Posted on 13-01-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Some of you may have wondered where I come up with all the [crazy] [profound] [interesting] [spiritual] [odd] blog posts that I write. (Choose whichever word best describes how you feel about them!) They come from my own experiences as well as conversations I have with others. However, I also spend a lot of time watching, listening and reading various philosophies which impact what I write. Read the rest of this entry »

Have You Been Making Yourself Suffer?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Thought | Posted on 22-12-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

ArguingI recently read a post in a Facebook group from a woman (let’s call her Jane) who was asking what people thought of the following:

Someone in her life (according to Jane): “Broke all her values, hurt her personally and deeply, made her cry and suffer and lose sleep for months.” Eventually Jane came to terms with the situation, but out of the blue the person invited her over for Christmas as if nothing had happened. She was confused and wondered what to do. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s All Relative – More Proof That We Create Our Own Reality

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 08-12-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Ever notice how the way we feel about pretty much anything depends on what else is going on?

Me "touching" the Louvre Pyramid

Me “touching” the Louvre Pyramid

Whether it’s the mood we happen to be in, or the time of day, or whatever might be on our plate at the moment–we react differently to the same exact news. Read the rest of this entry »

Relationship Rules: Whose Are Right?
A Tale of Two Players

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 21-11-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Playing DIfferent Games

Image Credit: Jessica Lucia

Imagine you are someone who learned to play checkers from a very early age and it’s the only game you play. You know all the rules, follow them to a T and play it confidently and well. At some point in your life you meet a partner who has played chess all his life. He knows all the rules, follows them to a T and plays it confidently and well. One day you take out your board and say let’s play! You’re both familiar with the game board itself, but each have your own separate pieces and own set of rules for playing. Read the rest of this entry »

Be a Leader Not a Follower: The Secret to Everything

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Business, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 05-11-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Be The LeaderHave you looked at leaders in your space or community, and wondered how they got there?

There could be millions of different ways, but I am 100% certain that it wasn’t by being a follower.

It seems that in our world, there are followers and there are leaders. While there can be some cross-over, for the most part we are one or the other.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Gain Higher Levels of Consciousness

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spiritual Teachings, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 02-11-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Higher Levels!If you’re into personal development and/or spiritual stuff, you may have noticed how you can read, listen or watch the same thing multiple times and hear something different.

It depends upon your mindset at the time. Read the rest of this entry »

Being the Observer of Your Thoughts

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 16-10-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Observing Our LifeMost of us live our lives without ever noticing our thoughts. When we don’t know what’s going on in our heads, most of the time we act unconsciously. We allow our reactive habits and behaviors to take over, and become like robots going through our programmed ways of dealing with life.

Which is a recipe for disaster. Read the rest of this entry »

Things Aren’t Always What They Seem

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 07-10-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Thing's Aren't Always as They Seem!I know it’s contrary to the way the world looks and feels on the surface, but we live in the experience of our thoughts. If you can start to grasp this strange inside-out nature of life–you’ll see and experience your own life in a whole new way. The more you truly see that it’s your own thoughts creating your experiences–and not the other way around–the more happy you’ll be. I promise!

With that in mind, here are some personal experiences where my thoughts played tricks on me and my reality changed in an instant: Read the rest of this entry »