Freedom of Choice and Living a Guided Life

0

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 27-09-2017

Tags: , , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Did you know that you have two minds?

Two MindsIf you’re like I was most of my life, you may not be in tune with what’s going on in your head at any given moment. So you may not be aware of your mind’s seemingly split personality. However, if you pay attention, it doesn’t take long to see our two minds in action.

There’s our “ego mind” and our “wisdom mind.”

Our ego mind is filled with fear and is mostly wrong about everything, yet it loudly and proudly proclaims its rightness.

Meanwhile, our wisdom mind is filled with love and sits quietly in the background knowing the real truth, and having the right answers.

In some ways, our split mind is like the proverbial angel and devil on our shoulders.

Here’s the problem…

Read the rest of this entry »

5 Reasons Why Being ‘Up in Arms’ is Dumb

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Business, Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 10-09-2017

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Have you ever noticed how certain people are always up in arms about something?

Are You Always Up in Arms?Whether it’s a situation at work, home or in our social circles, we can easily find a reason to feel put upon. As soon as one problem is cleared up, there’s always another around the corner. Plus there are plenty of horrible happenings in the news to feel bad about just in case we can’t find anything to complain about locally!

No doubt, there are a zillion things we can be up in arms over. But why would we want to? It seems kinda dumb to me. Read the rest of this entry »

Do We Need to Control Our Fears?

6

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 30-08-2017

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
Do We Need to Control Our Fears?

I’ve seen so many articles that tell us we should push past our fears and/or try to control them. While that’s satisfactory short-term advice, it’s not a long-term solution.

It’s simply not possible to control fear.

Fear always comes from thought in the moment. And thoughts are not under our control. Read the rest of this entry »

What’s Motivation Got To Do With It?

10

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Healthy Activities, Healthy Eating, Psychology | Posted on 09-08-2017

Tags: , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Keep Calm and Carry OnMy husband and I have been playing tennis during the summer for the past few years. This year we started a bit late in the season. It was staying lighter later in the evenings, but neither of us had mentioned tennis. I thought it would be a good idea to play again, but also had many contradictory thoughts. My back hurt, it was too hot, tennis was too much work. Blah, blah, blah. So rather than bring it up, I waited to see if my husband would get around to suggesting it.

Meanwhile I was secretly hoping he’d forget!

Inevitably, the day came when he asked if I wanted to play the next day.  To which I simply replied, “Sure.”

Had my thoughts and feelings changed about it?

Nope. Had my backed stopped hurting? Nope.

Read the rest of this entry »

Why Do We Need Others to Like Us?

0

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 12-07-2017

Tags: , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

How much of our good behavior is an attempt to fit in, be liked and not call attention to ourselves?

Most humans are generally good. They want to do the right thing as much as possible. Which great, because when we’re in a sticky situation, we can almost always find someone who’s willing to help us out.

But we also have a related drive of wanting to be liked. Which has some interesting implications in our daily lives. Read the rest of this entry »

Am I the Only One Who Feels This Way?

0

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Thought | Posted on 28-06-2017

Tags: , , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

What wise or stupid thing can man conceive that was not thought of in ages long ago?

–Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Faust, Part 2, Act II, The Gothic Chamber

Am I the Only One?For the past month or so, I’ve been hanging out at a few Facebook anxiety groups. A common question I see there is: “Am I the only one who experiences X, Y, or Z? Or alternatively, “Am I the only one who thinks these things and feels this way?”

The answer, of course, is a big, fat NO, as evidenced by all the others who join in and comment about their similar experiences. Read the rest of this entry »

The “Cure” for the Workaholic

0

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 12-06-2017

Tags: , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Raise your hand if you’re a workaholic.

WorkaholicIf you work 10+ hours a day, my Magic 8 Ball tells me that “chances are good” you are.

Like most workaholics, you probably have lots of excuses reasons why you have to work.

“Demanding boss.”

“Someone’s gotta do it.”

“Not enough time in the day.”

“I’m the only one who can do it right.”

I might ruffle some feathers here, but I’m calling bullshit on all of it.

The reason you are a workaholic is, just like all addictions, it feels good to you.

Read the rest of this entry »

Are You a Victim of Circumstance?

0

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 03-05-2017

Tags: , ,

Just Stand Up!

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

I saw a scene in a movie recently where a boy had fallen out of a boat and was thrashing around because he couldn’t swim. His friend on the shore yelled, “Just stand up!” As it turned out, he was in shallow water and simply needed to put his feet on the ground.

Once he knew he could stand, drowning was no longer an issue.

It’s the same with any misunderstanding.

Read the rest of this entry »

Pay Attention to How You Feel and Tune into Happiness

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Thought | Posted on 19-04-2017

Tags: , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Tune into Happiness!

Do you pay attention to how you feel?

It’s one of the most important things we can do for ourselves.

Because when we’re not feeling generally happy, we’re out of alignment with our true nature.

While it’s okay to feel bad (it happens to the best of us!), it’s not our natural state. Sadly, we’re so used to feeling crappy, we think that it’s normal.

But it’s definitely not.

Feeling unhappy is a sign that we’re out sync with our innate well-being.

Read the rest of this entry »

Let it Be: The Key to Happiness

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 22-03-2017

Tags: , , , , ,

Let it Be!

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

I once wrote a blog post on the topic of surrendering and letting go and how that was the secret to end suffering.

But you asked, “How do I do it? How do I let go?

My answer was always something along the lines of: How do you let go when falling asleep at night? And how do you let go when you don’t like the weather?

Even with these metaphors, surrendering or letting go still sounds like there’s something to do.

Recently, however, a colleague of mine said he’s been using the phrase “let it be” rather than “let go.”

I like it! Read the rest of this entry »

How to Go With The Flow and Live in The Zone

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Thought | Posted on 22-02-2017

Tags: , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
Go With The Flow

Have you ever had a sense of “The Flow” when playing a sport or pursuing a creative endeavor?

While flow (or being in “The Zone”) has always been a part of my work and my writing, I became acutely aware of it when I took up tennis a couple of years ago. At first I was pretty clunky. I had to deliberately think about everything I was doing in order to have any chance of hitting the ball. But after awhile and with enough practice, I was able to get the ball over the net with some proficiency.

However…

The more I thought about what I was trying to do, the worse I got.

Read the rest of this entry »

We Are Not Who (or What) We Think We Are

8

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 25-01-2017

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Not What We Think We AreI had a bit of an insight about our “true selves” last week which I’ll try to put into words here. I hope it makes some semblance of sense.

Here’s what I’ve seen…

As human beings, we are so wedded to our personality. Our individuality. Our identity. That part of us that seems to make us who we are. Our uniqueness. Our specialness.

Yet these aspects of us are also often our downfall. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Solve Problems and Make Decisions

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Thought | Posted on 11-01-2017

Tags: , , ,

Problem Solving[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

About a month ago a colleague was telling me about her business friend who picks up potential clients everywhere she goes. She seems to have perfected the art of meeting random people, telling them what she does for a living, and eventually signing them on as clients.

This peaked my curiosity as I’ve been struggling for what to say when people ask what I do. Often  I revert back to telling them about my old SEO career and how I’m now retired. Then I mumble something about what I’m up to these days. But overall, I haven’t felt very clear about it.

So I started thinking about what might be a good “elevator pitch” for the work I do now. As I pondered this a bit, it suddenly hit me: Read the rest of this entry »

How to Find Your Inner Peace

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Meditation, Psychology, Thought | Posted on 30-11-2016

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

There is nothing better than the feeling of peace.

Inner PeaceWhich is why we spend every moment of every day attempting to find it. Peace is like a homing device that’s beckoning us to come closer. It’s a sense of calm neutrality. It’s true happiness. In his new book, Michael Neill calls it “The Space Within.” And in Dicken Bettinger and Natasha Swerdloff’s book, they call it “Coming Home.” Anita Moorjani might call it “Heaven on Earth.”

Regardless of what you call it, peace is the feeling we all strive for–whether we know it or not.

Read the rest of this entry »

We’re All Different Yet We’re All the Same

5

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spiritual Teachings, Thought | Posted on 16-11-2016

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Different But The Same

We are all different.

Very different. So different that no two of us has the same mixture of magic ingredients that make us who we are. While this is totally awesome as we’d be bored to tears if we were all alike, it’s also what creates ALL the conflict in the world. Unfortunately, most of us don’t realize how different we are and therefore can’t understand why or even that others’ don’t see the world the same way we do.

The average person has no concept of  separate realities.

Read the rest of this entry »

Second Guessing, Jumping to Conclusions and Filling in the Blanks

4

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 02-11-2016

Tags: , , , ,

…Or How we Create our Unique Personal Reality

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
Jumping to Conclusions and Filling in the Blanks

What would you do if you found out that everything you think about life, other people and even yourself is at best, a good guess?

As human beings, that’s exactly how we operate.

Ponder this…

Read the rest of this entry »

Are You Ready To Change the Way You See the World?

2

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 05-10-2016

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Change the Way You See the WorldWhat if I told you that you’ve been lied to your entire life?

Not just you, but everyone.

And what if this lie was making you (and the rest of the world) feel miserable?

Would you want to know the truth?

Read the rest of this entry »

People Are Jerks (But it’s Got Nothing to Do With You) (Even When it Does!)

4

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 20-09-2016

Tags: , , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

People Are JerksLet’s face it, there are lots of jerky people out there. Many of them are part of our family. Some of them are our friends and colleagues. Heck, sometimes even we are the jerk!

But here’s the thing–when we are not the one being jerky, then it has nothing to do with us.

Regardless of what they are saying or doing.

Jerks are jerks, because they are jerks. Read the rest of this entry »

15 Steps to Creating a Brand New You!

6

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Healthy Activities, Healthy Eating, Psychology, Thought | Posted on 06-09-2016

Tags: , , ,

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]Transformation Waiting to Happen!

As you may have guessed from the name of my blog (What Did You Do With Jill?) I have changed. A lot. At this point (over 3 years into my personal transformation) I barely remember the old me. Still, every now and then I will think or say something about myself that isn’t really true anymore. Old habits die hard, I guess.

Or do they? Read the rest of this entry »

Do You Need More Lightheartedness in Your Life?

6

Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology | Posted on 27-07-2016

Tags: , , , ,

Lighthearted Toad[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Recently, I was taken aback when I learned that many people view lightheartedness as a weakness. Or something they shouldn’t show to the world.

“We’re grown ups, right? We’ve got to be serious!”

Yet I can’t imagine any quality more important to embrace than lightheartedness. Read the rest of this entry »