How to Go With The Flow and Live in The Zone

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Thought | Posted on 22-02-2017

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
Go With The Flow

Have you ever had a sense of “The Flow” when playing a sport or pursuing a creative endeavor?

While flow (or being in “The Zone”) has always been a part of my work and my writing, I became acutely aware of it when I took up tennis a couple of years ago. At first I was pretty clunky. I had to deliberately think about everything I was doing in order to have any chance of hitting the ball. But after awhile and with enough practice, I was able to get the ball over the net with some proficiency.

However…

The more I thought about what I was trying to do, the worse I got.

Read the rest of this entry »

We Are Not Who (or What) We Think We Are

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 25-01-2017

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Not What We Think We AreI had a bit of an insight about our “true selves” last week which I’ll try to put into words here. I hope it makes some semblance of sense.

Here’s what I’ve seen…

As human beings, we are so wedded to our personality. Our individuality. Our identity. That part of us that seems to make us who we are. Our uniqueness. Our specialness.

Yet these aspects of us are also often our downfall. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Solve Problems and Make Decisions

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Thought | Posted on 11-01-2017

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Problem Solving[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

About a month ago a colleague was telling me about her business friend who picks up potential clients everywhere she goes. She seems to have perfected the art of meeting random people, telling them what she does for a living, and eventually signing them on as clients.

This peaked my curiosity as I’ve been struggling for what to say when people ask what I do. Often  I revert back to telling them about my old SEO career and how I’m now retired. Then I mumble something about what I’m up to these days. But overall, I haven’t felt very clear about it.

So I started thinking about what might be a good “elevator pitch” for the work I do now. As I pondered this a bit, it suddenly hit me: Read the rest of this entry »

How to Find Your Inner Peace

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Meditation, Psychology, Thought | Posted on 30-11-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

There is nothing better than the feeling of peace.

Inner PeaceWhich is why we spend every moment of every day attempting to find it. Peace is like a homing device that’s beckoning us to come closer. It’s a sense of calm neutrality. It’s true happiness. In his new book, Michael Neill calls it “The Space Within.” And in Dicken Bettinger and Natasha Swerdloff’s book, they call it “Coming Home.” Anita Moorjani might call it “Heaven on Earth.”

Regardless of what you call it, peace is the feeling we all strive for–whether we know it or not.

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We’re All Different Yet We’re All the Same

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spiritual Teachings, Thought | Posted on 16-11-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Different But The Same

We are all different.

Very different. So different that no two of us has the same mixture of magic ingredients that make us who we are. While this is totally awesome as we’d be bored to tears if we were all alike, it’s also what creates ALL the conflict in the world. Unfortunately, most of us don’t realize how different we are and therefore can’t understand why or even that others’ don’t see the world the same way we do.

The average person has no concept of  separate realities.

Read the rest of this entry »

Second Guessing, Jumping to Conclusions and Filling in the Blanks

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 02-11-2016

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…Or How we Create our Unique Personal Reality

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
Jumping to Conclusions and Filling in the Blanks

What would you do if you found out that everything you think about life, other people and even yourself is at best, a good guess?

As human beings, that’s exactly how we operate.

Ponder this…

Read the rest of this entry »

Are You Ready To Change the Way You See the World?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 05-10-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Change the Way You See the WorldWhat if I told you that you’ve been lied to your entire life?

Not just you, but everyone.

And what if this lie was making you (and the rest of the world) feel miserable?

Would you want to know the truth?

Read the rest of this entry »

People Are Jerks (But it’s Got Nothing to Do With You) (Even When it Does!)

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 20-09-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

People Are JerksLet’s face it, there are lots of jerky people out there. Many of them are part of our family. Some of them are our friends and colleagues. Heck, sometimes even we are the jerk!

But here’s the thing–when we are not the one being jerky, then it has nothing to do with us.

Regardless of what they are saying or doing.

Jerks are jerks, because they are jerks. Read the rest of this entry »

15 Steps to Creating a Brand New You!

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Healthy Activities, Healthy Eating, Psychology, Thought | Posted on 06-09-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]Transformation Waiting to Happen!

As you may have guessed from the name of my blog (What Did You Do With Jill?) I have changed. A lot. At this point (over 3 years into my personal transformation) I barely remember the old me. Still, every now and then I will think or say something about myself that isn’t really true anymore. Old habits die hard, I guess.

Or do they? Read the rest of this entry »

Do You Need More Lightheartedness in Your Life?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology | Posted on 27-07-2016

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Lighthearted Toad[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Recently, I was taken aback when I learned that many people view lightheartedness as a weakness. Or something they shouldn’t show to the world.

“We’re grown ups, right? We’ve got to be serious!”

Yet I can’t imagine any quality more important to embrace than lightheartedness. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Have More Mental Wellbeing in Your Life

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 15-06-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]
How to Have More Mental Wellbeing

I was recently at a seminar about mental wellbeing facilitated by Dr. Bill Pettit and his wife, Dr. Linda Pettit. They are a psychiatrist and psychologist with many decades of clinical experience. What makes them and this seminar interesting, however, was rather than focusing on the mental illnesses and diagnoses of what’s wrong, they are more interested in the opposite. That is, the innate wellbeing inside each of their patients. From the schizophrenic to the bipolar, to the average couple having marital problems, this pair of Docs (paradox!) are able to see right past all of that. They zero in on the natural mental health that resides deep within their patients (and all of us). Read the rest of this entry »

My 3 Year Anniversary of Taking Back My Life

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Healthy Activities, Healthy Eating, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 04-05-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Yay Me!This past Sunday (May 1, 2016) marked 3 years since I began my transformational journey. What started as a simple decision to lose weight, has culminated in a whole new me–both physically and mentally.

Here’s a recap: Read the rest of this entry »

How to Live in Peace Regardless of Your Circumstances

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Meditation, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 06-04-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

PeaceHow’s life treating you these days?

Is it fun? Is it peaceful?

Or is it tedious and hard?

If you answered the latter, what’s making life such a struggle for you? Read the rest of this entry »

Labeling and Judging: Why Do We Label Others?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spirituality, Things I've Learned, Thought | Posted on 26-01-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Being JudgedNow that I’m often observing my thoughts, I’ve noticed some that surprise me.  For instance, I never thought of myself as judgmental, yet some of my thoughts tell me otherwise. Read the rest of this entry »

My Mentors and What I’ve Been Reading and Watching

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Miscellaneous, Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality | Posted on 13-01-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Some of you may have wondered where I come up with all the [crazy] [profound] [interesting] [spiritual] [odd] blog posts that I write. (Choose whichever word best describes how you feel about them!) They come from my own experiences as well as conversations I have with others. However, I also spend a lot of time watching, listening and reading various philosophies which impact what I write. Read the rest of this entry »

Have You Been Making Yourself Suffer?

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Thought | Posted on 22-12-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

ArguingI recently read a post in a Facebook group from a woman (let’s call her Jane) who was asking what people thought of the following:

Someone in her life (according to Jane): “Broke all her values, hurt her personally and deeply, made her cry and suffer and lose sleep for months.” Eventually Jane came to terms with the situation, but out of the blue the person invited her over for Christmas as if nothing had happened. She was confused and wondered what to do. Read the rest of this entry »

Relationship Rules: Whose Are Right?
A Tale of Two Players

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 21-11-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Playing DIfferent Games

Image Credit: Jessica Lucia

Imagine you are someone who learned to play checkers from a very early age and it’s the only game you play. You know all the rules, follow them to a T and play it confidently and well. At some point in your life you meet a partner who has played chess all his life. He knows all the rules, follows them to a T and plays it confidently and well. One day you take out your board and say let’s play! You’re both familiar with the game board itself, but each have your own separate pieces and own set of rules for playing. Read the rest of this entry »

Things Aren’t Always What They Seem

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 07-10-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Thing's Aren't Always as They Seem!I know it’s contrary to the way the world looks and feels on the surface, but we live in the experience of our thoughts. If you can start to grasp this strange inside-out nature of life–you’ll see and experience your own life in a whole new way. The more you truly see that it’s your own thoughts creating your experiences–and not the other way around–the more happy you’ll be. I promise!

With that in mind, here are some personal experiences where my thoughts played tricks on me and my reality changed in an instant: Read the rest of this entry »

Uncovering Our Innate Mental Health and Wellbeing

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Running, Spiritual Teachings, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 26-08-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

I’ve been using the phrase “Uncovering Our Innate Mental Health and Wellbeing” a lot lately. I’m leading a local MeetUp Group using that name as well as a Facebook Group. The idea is to build a local community who are interested in uncovering their innate mental health. So far we’ve had a couple of in-person discussions, and have another one scheduled for September.

While we already have over 80 members, it occurred to me that some may not quite understand what “uncovering our innate mental health” means. I’m pretty sure those words wouldn’t have meant much to me a couple of years ago. The premise is that everyone–you, me, your neighbor, your spouse, your kids, murderers, cops, starving children in Africa–everyone, was born with a healthy mind. It’s our natural state. (That’s what the innate part means.) Nobody is born angry, depressed or anxious. In other words, we are all born happy. Read the rest of this entry »

3 Midlife Crisis Cliches Women Often Face

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Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Healthy Activities, Healthy Eating, Spirituality, Things I've Learned, Thought, Yoga | Posted on 11-06-2015

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Midlife Crisis?Okay. I admit it. I’m somewhere within the second half of my life. Does this mean my life transformation has been part of a “Midlife Crisis”? I shudder at the thought. No crisis here! But I can see how the deep inner desire for change I experienced could be unsettling for some.

It’s clear that women in their 50’s seem to have some innate desire for change.  Some do nothing (but complain) when those desires hit, others go hog wild and completely uproot their lives. Others, pursue their desires in a way that is positive and helpful. I like to think I’m in the latter group.

Midlife crises are often depicted in popular culture in a cliched manner. Career changes, leaving a spouse and taking up yoga seem to be some of the more popular cliches. Let’s examine these and see how valid they are.  Read the rest of this entry »