8 Things You Need to Know About Life That Nobody Taught You


Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Psychology, Relationships, Spirituality, Thought | Posted on 03-28-2018

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

What Nobody Ever Taught You About Life

I lived half a century before I learned how life really works!

Even though it took so long, I’m very grateful I eventually learned it. Sadly, most people never do.

You see, we are brought up believing the world works one way, when it actually works another. It isn’t anyone’s fault. It’s simply a misunderstanding perpetuated by our society and culture. A very convincing misunderstanding, for sure. But a misunderstanding, nevertheless.


When we learn how things really work, it can transform our lives in amazing ways!

So without further ado, here are the 8 most important things you need to know about life that nobody ever taught you:

1. It’s Our Thoughts That Cause Us to Feel Bad, Not Situations and Other People.

This is probably the most important thing we should all know, but don’t! It looks so much like people and situations make us feel sad, mad, scared, happy, etc. Yet in reality, it’s our very own thoughts creating our experiences. When we realize at a deep level that our feelings come from thoughts and not situations, it moves us away from victim status to empowered, because thoughts in and of themselves have no power to hurt us.

2. Other People’s Thoughts Are What Cause Them to Act Out.

Just like our own thoughts are what cause our feelings and emotions, it’s super helpful to know that everyone else works the same way too.
In other words, we’re not the cause of other people’s anger, sadness or fear. Their behavior, whether good or bad, is a direct result of whatever is going on in their mind at the moment. Knowing this can give us a new perspective on those “difficult” people in our life. It’s much easier to cultivate compassion for others who are caught up in some really bad thoughts, as we’ve all been there. The cool thing is that regardless of whether the other person realizes why they’re acting out, our knowing alone, has the power to transform some seemingly sticky situations.

3. We All Have a Crazy Person That Lives in Our Head.

We often look around us and think that everyone but us has their life perfectly together. It seems like we’re the only one who has crazy, scary thoughts going on ALL THE TIME. But it’s simply not true. Every single person on the planet has the same crazy thoughts. Knowing that we’re actually normal, can make a huge difference to our lives.

This video expands upon this concept:

4. Our Way of Seeing the World is Vastly Different From Everyone Else’s.

Because we live inside of our heads most of the time, we believe that our opinions, preferences and beliefs are THE RIGHT and only ones. Yet everyone else believes the same about theirs. With so many differing beliefs and preferences that feel like TRUTH, it’s no wonder we have difficulties getting along with others.

5. Happiness Really Does Come From Within.

While this sounds cliche, it’s one of the most helpful things to truly see about life. When we don’t really know this for a fact, we are on a constant search to feel peaceful and happy. Which is what makes life one great big addiction. We flit from the next best thing to the next best person, in hopes that they’ll do it for us. But they never can, because they’re not where our peace of mind comes from.

6. We Have Our Own Inner Guide That Can Be Relied Upon.

Inside of all of us is wisdom in the form of an inner guide. While it’s always there and always accessible (because it’s actually our true nature), we don’t always hear it due to our personal thought system being so loud. And even when we do hear it, we often override it. However, once we know it’s there and learn to trust it, life becomes a whole lot easier.

7. We Are Not That Voice in Our Head.

It sounds like us and has been with us since we could talk…yet that voice in our head is NOT who we are. Nor is it a reliable source of information. Yet, because we believe it is us and we think we need to act on its every whim, it often wreaks havoc in our lives.

8. We Need to Become Aware of Our Thoughts.

None of the above important things to know in life can truly be understood without us having more overall awareness. We believe we know our minds and what we’re thinking, but we rarely do. Our minds are like an iceberg with just the tip of it sticking above the surface. If we are lucky, we’re aware of those obvious conscious thoughts on top. But even that is rare for many of us. Yet without awareness of what’s going on in our mind, we will continue to get dragged along in life by whatever thoughts and feelings happen to strike us at any given moment. Therefore, there is no better pursuit in life than becoming an observer of our thoughts.

Please don’t take my word for any of these. Whether they make sense to you or they sound like utter garbage, it’s up to you to seek your own evidence for the truth (or falseness) of what I’m telling you. If you hear even the slightest grain of truth, I encourage you to explore further.

Let me know how it goes!


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CONTACT JILL WHALEN to learn how she may help you be the best you can be.

Jill is the author of Victim of Thought: Seeing Through the Illusion of Anxiety

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For the past 20 years, Jill has consulted with companies big and small, and spoken at conferences all over the world. She is currently a transformational speaker and mentor to businesses, individuals, coaches, leaders, groups and organizations. She helps them uncover their natural well-being and happiness so that they can operate from a clearer state of mind and take their lives and businesses to a higher level.

Jill's blog, What Did You Do With Jill? is a personal account of what she's learned throughout her transformational journey. Jill has many "viral" articles on LinkedIn and is a contributing writer for P.S. I Love You.

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Leave Your Thoughts Below(6)

I believe this whole heartedly! Society and social media train us in what to believe and feel and see.
I refuse to do Facebook or watch Fox or CNN.

Thanks, James. When we know that the world can’t make us feel any particular way, we can watch anything on TV or online and it has no power to affect us one way or another. Which is more to the point of my post, I think.

Great blog Jill.. thank you.

From no. 8 I linked into the article you wrote about ‘becoming an observer of our thoughts’. Your discovery makes so much sense. I have tried to do this myself, for some reason, I can’t seem to observe thoughts as they occur …I can recall them afterwards, but not as they are actually happening. I wonder if this is because I’m not good at keeping focused and using my attention in the right area, as it were. Maybe mediators have better focus?
Do you have any tips at all?
Thank you…loved your book and enjoying your blog.

Hi Karen, it really doesn’t matter if you’re focused or not. And the thing is that you don’t really have to observe the content of your thoughts. Just seeing that you are having thoughts is what’s most helpful. Can you see that sometimes?

Thank you for your response. ❤.

I seem to notice thinking when there is a decision to be made and when I am ‘planning’ what to say or write to someone (like now) Then it feels as if I own those thoughts. The other thoughts (those thoughts that get me happy angry sad etc) I don’t seem to realise they are happeningl until afterwards. Not so good when anger results. . I am going to try and be more attentive to thoughts..whatever the content …

Perfect! Let me know how it goes. 🙂