What Did You Do With Jill?Jill Whalen's healthy lifestyle transformation                                               

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version and a related video.]

We spend so much of our present moment time trying to predict the future. And when we’re not doing that, we ruminate over the past. We beat ourselves up for putting ourselves in the situation we’re in, and do our best to figure out every possible solution and outcome.

Neither of which is helpful.

All the wishing in the world that we did things differently can’t change the current state of affairs. Learning from our mistakes is one thing, but placing blame on ourselves or others for how things turned out, is 100% useless. There’s no sense in looking back.

Inevitably, life throws curve balls at us.

What’s happening now, is just what’s happening now.

Read the rest of this entry »

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version. See also the corresponding video on this topic.]

In a recent blog post I wrote that whatever is going on in our lives is simply what’s happening. This is true of both good and bad things. Whether it’s a so-called problem, a crisis, an illness, or something stupendously superb–it’s just what’s happening.

Which means that we have no control over it.

And by “it,” I mean stuff. Life. Everything.

I can already hear your ego-self rebelling at those words. If so, you’re especially not gonna like this next bit. Read the rest of this entry »

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

I’ve seen so many articles that tell us we should push past our fears and/or try to control them. While that’s satisfactory short-term advice, it’s not a long-term solution.

It’s simply not possible to control fear.

Fear always comes from thought in the moment. And thoughts are not under our control. Read the rest of this entry »

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

“What wise or stupid thing can man conceive that was not thought of in ages long ago?“

–Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Faust, Part 2, Act II, The Gothic Chamber

For the past month or so, I’ve been hanging out at a few Facebook anxiety groups. A common question I see there is: “Am I the only one who experiences X, Y, or Z? Or alternatively, “Am I the only one who thinks these things and feels this way?”

The answer, of course, is a big, fat NO, as evidenced by all the others who join in and comment about their similar experiences. Read the rest of this entry »

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

“You’re so dumb!” 

“You should know better.”

“You’re no good at that.”

“What makes you think you’re so great?”

Would you pay attention to and believe someone who said those things to you on a regular basis?

Probably not!

So why do you listen to and believe that voice in your head that says them?

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…Or How we Create our Unique Personal Reality

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

What would you do if you found out that everything you think about life, other people and even yourself is at best, a good guess?

As human beings, that’s exactly how we operate.

Ponder this…

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

Why is it so hard for us to be our true authentic self?

My guess is fear.

It seems that our authenticity gets “beaten” out of us when we’re little. Between getting teased as kids for being our wacky selves and our parents berating us to “act like everyone else,” slowly but surely we start to create a public persona that’s considered socially acceptable. We believe if the rest of the world knew how crazy, weird, dumb, silly or whatever we are deep inside, that there’s no way in hell they could like us–let alone love us. Read the rest of this entry »

[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

© Mad Magazine

You know what’s weird? Worry.

I can’t remember even one instance where something I worried about ever actually occurred. This isn’t to say that it’s never happened, but the fact that I can’t think of any tells me that my worry has a really bad track record! Read the rest of this entry »