How to Live in Peace Regardless of Your Circumstances


Posted by Jill Whalen | Posted in Meditation, Relationships, Thought | Posted on 04-06-2016

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[Jill’s Note: If you prefer to listen rather than read, please scroll to the bottom of this post for the audio version.]

PeaceHow’s life treating you these days?

Is it fun? Is it peaceful?

Or is it tedious and hard?

If you answered the latter, what’s making life such a struggle for you?

Perhaps the state of your health or that of a loved isn’t what you’d like it to be. Or maybe your job feels extremely stressful or boring. Or your relationship(s) sucks and/or you’re struggling to find Mr. or Ms. Right. Maybe you lack the funds to do the things you really want to do.

Do any or all of those ring true to you?

What if you knew that nothing in the outside world can make you feel bad?

That’s correct. Poor health, “bad” relationships, lack of money and a crappy boss are not what’s making you feel shitty, no matter how much it feels like they are.

The only thing that makes you feel lousy (or happy, or anything) is your state of mind. It’s the Thoughts about what goes on around you that causes your experience of it.

All of it.

This is not to say that those crazy, yukky things are good and you should enjoy them. It’s more to say that you can be peaceful and enjoy life moment to moment, regardless of your circumstances.

Thought (with a capital T) is what goes through our heads all day, every day. Because each of us has our own unique set of Thoughts, we experience life in our own unique way. We’re kinda like snowflakes in that no two of us will experience any given situation the same way.

This is the reason why someone like Viktor Frankl could survive in a concentration camp and come out relatively unscathed mentally, while many others could not. His state of mind (Thoughts) created a different experience than those around him. While he was in the same horrific situation as everyone else, he knew his survival depended on making the best of it on a moment to moment basis. In other words, the way he thought about his situation, enabled him to see and find whatever crumbs of goodness there were. Which in turn, kept him sane.

That, of course, is an extreme example. But it’s a good one because it shows us that if even one human being can find relative peace in the worst situation imaginable, then whatever is going on in our own lives, should surely be a piece of cake.

And yet it often isn’t.

Life is not meant to be difficult. While shit’s always gonna happen, it’s how we think about it that will determine how we feel. If we can remain in a high state of mind even when it hits the fan (or at least soon after it hits) we can not only survive whatever happens to us, we can experience many enjoyable moments along the way.

This is when life gets fun and peaceful.

When we are able to see the good in life regardless of what’s going on around us, it becomes like a game. Everything we do moves us in the direction of what inspires us. And when we’re inspired, life becomes effortless. Because of the way we’re thinking while inspired, even though we may be working extremely hard, it doesn’t feel like it. It just feels fun!

Look again now at how your days unfold.

Are they fun? Are they easy and peaceful?

If not, what or whom are you blaming for your bad luck or tough days?

When we let go of blame, we see the world and our life in a whole new way.

Can you see even a tiny bit how your thoughts might be playing a part?

Please note that I’m absolutely not saying that we can or should try to change our thoughts. It’s not possible as a long term strategy. It’s about Knowing that underneath all of our thoughts is true Peace. It’s there always. In good times and bad. Which means it’s always accessible.



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CONTACT JILL WHALEN to learn how she may help you be the best you can be.

Jill is the author of Victim of Thought: Seeing Through the Illusion of Anxiety

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For the past 20 years, Jill has consulted with companies big and small, and spoken at conferences all over the world. She is currently a transformational speaker and mentor to businesses, individuals, coaches, leaders, groups and organizations. She helps them uncover their natural well-being and happiness so that they can operate from a clearer state of mind and take their lives and businesses to a higher level.

Jill's blog, What Did You Do With Jill? is a personal account of what she's learned throughout her transformational journey. Jill has many "viral" articles on LinkedIn and is a contributing writer for P.S. I Love You.

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Jill, thank you so much for posting this. The timing is perfect. Really each one of your posts seems to always have perfecting timing for me and really sheds light onto things. I truly look forward to when my email has a newsletter from you. I feel relief and more understanding each time I read one. Lol, I wish they were more frequent. Thanks again!

Hi Natalie, thanks for letting me know. I’m so glad you find my posts helpful. Sometimes I wonder if I’m making sense and/or just writing for myself as I don’t always get feedback! As to more frequent, I’ve been having a lull in my inspired writing lately, so I don’t think that’s going to happen. But if you ever want to have a phone or skype chat about anything related to what I write (or whatever) please get in touch!

Thanks, Jill!


Nice post Jill!

Thanks, Wendi. Appreciate it!

Very nicely expressed, Jill! I’ve been contemplating these questions a lot lately…looking at how my days unfold and what I might do to bring in more ease and joy. Thoughts no doubt play a role. There is always room for growth, and as you know, it is an ever evolving journey :).

Thanks, Diane. IMO thoughts are everything! That said, it’s sure hard for me to see that in certain situations with certain people.

Good one, Jill.

Thanks, Beth! As you know, I’m having a bit of trouble this week practicing what I’m preaching.

I think you have been doing great, given the circumstances. You have impressed me to no end and you know I can be the toughest critic.

Wow, thank you. I’ve been beating myself up over here!